Our invisible bubbles

Have you ever noticed that some people tend to stand just a little closer… or a little farther away?

This small, often unconscious detail can completely change the tone of an interaction. What we call personal space (that invisible zone surrounding our bodies) varies significantly across cultures. In some countries, it's considered sacred; in others, it’s fluid, even barely noticeable.

But beyond individual preferences, personal space is a subtle language, shaped by the social habits and norms we are exposed to as we grow up.

In North American, Germanic, or Scandinavian cultures, physical distance is closely tied to respect. A firm handshake, limited physical contact, and a protective bubble of about one meter — these are the signs of a well-structured social exchange. In Latin America, the Middle East, or sub-Saharan Africa, physical closeness plays a much more central role. People often stand nearer, speak more intimately, and may gently touch a shoulder or arm while talking. Physical contact builds connection, and its absence may come across as cold or indifferent. In East Asian cultures, the rules are more nuanced. In Japan, for example, personal space is deeply respected, with restrained gestures and minimal physical interaction. In densely populated places like China or India, physical proximity is often tolerated in public spaces, but still governed by specific social codes.

Cross-cultural misunderstandings around personal space are common. A Brazilian colleague stepping in close to speak might unsettle a German counterpart. A Canadian who instinctively steps back to regain her comfort zone may unintentionally come across as distant to a Lebanese colleague.

But this isn’t about judging — it’s about understanding. These reactions are often shaped by deeply ingrained sensory and emotional conditioning. Respecting others begins with recognizing those differences.

While personal space is largely shaped by culture, it’s also influenced by subtler elements in our everyday lives. Several factors shape how we experience and adjust our “bubble” of space:

• Level of intimacy: The closer we are emotionally to someone — a friend, partner, or family member — the more relaxed we tend to be with physical distance. With strangers or acquaintances, that space often widens.

• Gender and social norms: Cultural expectations often dictate different rules for how close men, women, and non-binary people are “allowed” to stand to one another, especially in formal or religious settings.

• Age: Children typically have smaller personal bubbles and tend to be more spontaneous with physical closeness than adults.

• Social situations: In lineups, for example, personal space becomes an unspoken marker of respect. In some cultures, it’s expected to leave a clear gap between yourself and the person ahead of you. In others, especially in crowded public settings, standing closer is perfectly normal. These variations can lead to discomfort, confusion, or even conflict when a behaviour is perceived as intrusive — or, conversely, as cold or dismissive.

Whether we’re travelling, working in multicultural environments, or simply going about our day-to-day lives, paying attention to how others manage personal space can be both enlightening and useful. Instead of falling back on our own cultural instincts, why not adopt a posture of curiosity and attentiveness? We can observe, adjust, experiment… and sometimes, take a step back — or perhaps, a step closer.

Ultimately, personal space is a quiet yet powerful form of communication. It reveals our sensitivities, our cultural roots, and our way of saying: I’m here, and where are you? Learning to read this invisible language is already a meaningful step toward a deeper connection.